Listen to What Is and What Should Never Be by Led Zeppelin

Smells Like... my feet

Actually, I can say with grateful relief that I don't have a foot odor problem (Gentleman, take note). But since this post is about Nirvana, one of the greatest rock bands ever,  I had to give a nod to their most famous song. I'm of course referring to "Smells Like Teen Spirit". This song fuels me just as much today as it did when I first heard it in my youth. The guitar opener stops me cold each and every time, then rips me open to the point where I willingly spill forth all my guts and emotions. Kurt Cobain still holds space for us posthumously. I always felt permission to feel or think whatever the hell I wanted under his unintentional direction. Whether or not what was/is going on inside me makes sense to the outside world is irrelevant. Many of Kurt's lyrics are like WTF, but it somehow never mattered. There was something bigger happening than phonetics.

If you never saw the video to this song, I strongly suggest looking it up. It completely encapsulated the dark, teenage, human angst roiling up inside of a misunderstood generation. Is there even a thing as an "understood" youthful generation? I don't think so. It's part of adolescent development to be confused, sad, angry, alone, adrift, frustrated, and unable to understand or explain why. Which is why teens cling so manically to musicians that can explain and feel more clearly than they can. Think about how many songs from that era you still respond to do viscerally. Chances are those songs aren't necessarily musical masterpieces, but they reached inside you, grabbed hold of your emotions, and set them free. Four and a half minutes of freedom is sometimes all we need to get through the day. All the video footage of Beatlemania, or hot early Elvis days, showing women fainting and literally tearing their hair out; that's all so real. Music makes people crazy because at the root of all of us is this deep longing to be understood. When we feel understood by a musician, a guitar riff, or a set of lyrics, it's this burst of energetic relief. It's more satisfying than popping a water balloon. 

Kurt Cobain, despite all his demons, lifted up (and continues to lift) an entire generation, a generation that felt crushed by his suicide. Going back to the gothic cheerleader in the video that I am dying to dress up as. Can someone please make a not nerdy Purim party?? The whole squad looked like this, but the one I couldn't take my eyes off of had braided pigtails, a little Catholic girl skirt, piercings, and major tattoos. There was something about the way she moved and how her hair flew that mesmerized me. I listen to that song all the time, and always think about her. She obviously represented a part of me I wanted to release. An F U boldness that was impervious to all else. Twenty five years later, I still want to emulate her. The cheerleaders moved in this deliberate slow motion, that was fiercely apathetic yet devoted to something. We all go through the motions of life, while often having zero comprehension or control over what the hell is happening inside us.   The drums on Teen Spirit still drive me wild. I've fallen off the elliptical machine several times trying to "air drum"🙄. Apparently I can neither drum in actuality nor in my fantasies. I've ALWAYS wished I could drum, since childhood. Lenny Kravitz and Billy Joel both have female drummers (Billy Joel's might be a percussionist), and watching them fills me with awe and envy.  Lithium, All Apologies; unfortunately the list does not go on very long, but all of it is gold.

As a teen in the MTV generation, I watched Nirvana Unplugged until my eyes and heart bled. Dave Grohl in that low ponytail and turtle neck is an image forever burned in my mind. I'll never forget listening desperately to Courtney Love on the radio, the night Kurt took his life. She was the First Lady of grunge. She was a piece of work, but he loved her, so I did too.     

Fast forward 25 years later, and I just discovered Instagram. I find this artist on IG, @topherkearby. He writes and draws beautifully. His cartoons are superb. I saw a rendering Topher did of my beloved Kurt a few months back. Then there was  an offer on his account for custom Converse. I messaged him requesting Nirvana sneakers. They are incredible, and a comfort to me. After so many years, we still miss who we miss. Once a person impacts us so deeply, we will fill that hole with whatever we can get our hands (or feet) on. I can never walk in Kurt Cobain's shoes, but now I have him painted on mine. These shoes are art, and art is often found in the unlikeliest of places. Beauty when we least expect it. Messages in the mess. At 40 I still feel like I reek of Teen Spirit. I don't ever want to wash that away.

🤘🏻, LB

Broiled 🍗 With Caramelized🍋

This is a snap to make! I threw it together for my son’s friend (god forbid my own kid should eat it🙄) . It was legit stuff I had in the pantry, and it turned out to be a great jazzed up bbq sauce. It’s almost impossible to ruin chicken when it’s dry rubbed, baked, marinated , then crisped under the broiler. I’m so tempted to eat it since I cut chicken out of my diet. I think chicken often looks delicious, but when I take a bite it doesn’t jive with my taste buds right now. Who knows, this could change, but it’s where I’m at right now. I still like cooking it though. This is a super recipe for achieving BBQ flavor and texture without using an actual grill. City peeps, where you at🍔🌭🍗🏢🗽?     

You will need a chicken cut into eight pieces, or two if you’re feeding a crowd. Feel free to use only dark or white parts depending on your preference. I love doing just drumsticks or wings for the kids. SKIN ON is vital to the crispy outside, as well as keeping the meat moist and juicy. Preheat oven to 375. Mix a tbsp each of garlic powder, paprika, and cumin with a tsp and a half of kosher salt and a half tsp fine ground pepper. Smoked paprika is great here.

Drizzle chicken parts in a single layer in a pan with olive oil. Then spoon on spice mixture. Pick up each piece and rub to coat. Double spices if needed. FYI, you can keep this spice rub in your pantry to use at all times, on meat and fish too. It’s a staple because it’s so versatile. Make sure chicken is skin up in the pan. Slice a lemon, placing a slice on each piece. Cover tightly with foil!!! This locks in serious juices. Bake for one hour.

Remove from oven and let sit for ten minutes. Remove foil and let the steam calm down. Mix a cup of bbq sauce with half a cup each of balsamic vinegar and honey mustard. Spoon on chicken, after setting aside lemon slices. Save the lemon for serving. Let marinate for about 15 minutes. Can be up to a half hour. Preheat broiler on high. Broil chicken several minutes on top part of the oven until skin gets dark and crisp, even blackened in some spots if you dig that (I do). Remove and let cool slightly. Put lemon slices back on top before serving. If making drumsticks or wings, bake covered chicken for about 45 minutes instead of the full hour. This Jesscipe is dedicated to WG, my son’s OG. 🍗❤️🍗❤️

International Love❤️🌎🌓

This is a very special post for me to write, and I've been so excited to finally put pen to paper (or finger to keyboard). Bloggers write about our experiences, and this particular experience was life changing for me. I'm sure you recall that several months ago I met with Sassy Shif, a hugely popular lifestyle blogger and influencer from Mumbai, India. Shiffy had reached out to me in the beginning of January. She was coming to NYC for the first time, and wanted to meet up and collaborate. This alone floored me. That a woman from across the globe was aware of me, read my stuff, felt a connection, and sought me out as a fellow voice in the biz. Shiffy's warmth and authenticity was clear from her first email. I instantly liked her, not just because I was flattered that she reached out. It was incredibly moving to really live the power of social media. Shiffy finding me, getting to know me through my words and feelings, and then coming to collaborate based on a connection she felt, represents the best of what social has the potential to offer. Introducing and uniting likeminded souls from anywhere in the world, creating bonds and friendships, sharing knowledge, offering support to strangers. I was quite emotional about all this, and for the first time I realized the reach I have as a blogger. I've written my whole life, but writing things that are seen outside the notebooks I keep in my nightstand is still fairly new. Writing isn't a want, it's a need. At my happiest or at my absolute lowest, what I reach for is a pen and paper. Always. That or my music. I never understood my writing to be impactful because no one really saw it. Shiffy saw it and bonded with my thoughts before we ever met. How freaking cool???

The idea of bloggers from different countries joining together to share cross cultural ideas on fashion, music, pop culture, and spirituality is so beautiful and important. We are all roots on the same tree, so we should be growing together. I have come to think of Source Energy as that giant tree from the film Avatar. That tree was life, knowledge, and energy to all beings. We all need to breathe, eat, sleep, be loved... The list of how similar we really are goes on. That Shiffy is from India, the yoga motherland, was not lost on me. An added dimension for me was that this is the first year of my 40 year old life that I finally have non Jewish friends from other ethnicities and cultures. That new reality is so important to me. I have no more interest in living in a bubble and only being friends with one type of person. That no longer makes an iota of sense. Good people are good people and that's it. I want my tribe to include any pure, kind, creative, giving human. What religion or race they are is inconsequential. This is not new for anyone reading this who isn't an Orthodox Jew, but trust me, it's a big deal for us. We just don't have the exposure. We live in certain types of communities, send our kids to certain types of schools and camps, and really only know a certain social group. It's extremely limiting. It might be enough for some, but it is doubtlessly limiting. By meeting Shiffy I was like, "Holy F, I'm getting a buddy in India👏🏻🌎❤️". Words I never thought I'd say, and I am all about embracing new opportunity.

Fast forward to our meeting. I decided to take Shiffy and her delightful husband, Salman, who is her talented photographer, to the Lower East Side. I wanted to show her one of the hippest, coolest neighborhoods in NYC. Scratch DJ Academy, my second home, is right nearby, so I'm on the LES all the time. It's all it's rumored to be, FYI. We began our meeting at the Ludlow hotel, at the super cool restaurant Dirty French. I knew she'd love it. I was brimming with excitement; I was meeting my Indian pen pal📝💛. It is very rare that upon meeting someone for the first time, that I'm not the most exuberant. I've always considered myself a camp counselor type; the gal that sets the mood and energy in the room. Very seldom am I out the gate energetically matched. Shiffy bounded in, arms outstretched, and jumped in for a hug. Yasssss! I loved her on sight. It was a breath of fresh air to have someone else set the tone. This is the best way I can describe Shiffy: she is the kind of person to give you the clothes off her back. I know this since that's just what she did. After I complimented her on her beautiful, bright, Indian style ensemble, she literally took off all three pieces and handed them to me. So giving, so enthusiastic. We sat down to mimosas and  ubiquitous avocado toast 🍾, and shot the shit about our respective hometowns. We discussed upcoming Spring outerwear fashion trends. I brought a large selection of my own jackets that I've amassed over the years, many of which are of the moment. Shiffy loved the metallics, the bomber jacket looks, and the two textured denim jackets the best. It was a fun show and tell situation. We couldn't stop chatting and marveling over the power social media has to connect and unite. I learned a lot about the blogging industry in India. We took fantastic NYC street photos, then had a lovely lunch at the iconic Laduree. It was such an instabond!

Our adventures over the next few weeks continued with numerous NYFW events, PR parties, and a photo shoot at the James Nomad hotel. I gave her a long list of places to go and things to do in NYC. She and Salman even came to my lesson at Scratch one day! Shiffy and I are constantly in touch, sharing respect, admiration, and love for each other. Our goal is to seek out like minded, substantial bloggers who truly wish to positively impact our followers. So many are in it just for superficial attention. Shiffy was a major Bollywood marketing executive before becoming an influencer. Follow her and you'll quickly see how she wants to share, spread, and include her peeps in the best life has to offer. Her positivity and honesty is clear. Time zones and continents are irrelevant when a pure soul shoots her arrow in the right way. My dream is to meet with her and Salman in Mumbai next time! It will happen. I feel so grateful that Shiffy stumbled upon me, researched me, and chose me to be her New York buddy. I feel even more grateful that I have a new friend for life. 🌎✌🏼️Namaste, Shiffy. The light in me most certainly recognizes the light in you✨✨✨. Om, shanti to all our followers, wherever they may be for now.

Fashion Week

Vintage OG

It feels so good and true to return to my love of a solid vintage find. Whilst on a stay cation in Williamsburg (Brooklyn, not Virginia) I found a super cool little vintage spot. The store was tiny, in a space that essentially housed a collection of walk in kiosks. Maybe that's not a kiosk, I don't know. But you get the picture. In five seconds I zeroed in on this hat, grease stained mechanics jacket, and lil boy bow tie. I also bought a blue tin box that I use for my ever present Tums and Altoids😂, as well as a giant safety pin. I'll put it on a silver chain and wear it as a pendant.

The hat is a Borsalino from the 20's. I know that name only because very orthodox men who wear black hats will buy a prestigious Borsalino. Well, I'm a chick and this one is brown, but it's all good in the hood 🎩. I wear my Current Elliot overalls with everything. I fully intend to use the mechanic jacket as outerwear, even over an LBD. A whimsical, unexpected something that keeps me warm is way more fun than anything typical. The bow tie is a clip on👓💼. The red leather rope I got on Amazon, and just looped it on as a slouchy, skater Gurl detail. Now the sneakers, those are a separate post altogether... Stay tuned👟👟🤘🏻.

I've always loved anything with a history. It makes living in the present a boatload more interesting. A well priced antique piece is so much more of a statement, than an expensive labeled something that probably isn't very distinctive in any way. Style can't really be bought; it's created. Vintage has a built in personality.  It's instantly interesting. And since I love a fashion challenge, it's delightful to hunt through a good vintage treasure chest. I really recommend searching for local spots near you and taking a visit. There's probably one near you that you don't even know of. You never know what you'll find, and it's so fun to hit the jackpot. It's a wearable Antiques Roadshow.

Queen of Tarts 🍏👑

This is an uncomplicated, beautiful apple tart. Any fruit can be used with this base. Sliced peaches or plums looks beautiful too🍑. Anything with a fluted edge looks so pretty and professional.

Ingredients:

Stick butter

1 cup sugar

2 eggs

1 tsp vanilla

1 cup flour

1 tsp baking powder

2 green apples

Apricot preserves 

Directions:

Oven 350. Grease a tart pan with a removable bottom really well, set aside. Cream a softened stick of butter or margarine with a cup of sugar in a mixer with the paddle attachment. Mix a couple minutes on medium, scraping down the sides halfway through. Add a tsp of vanilla and two eggs. Mix.

Then add a cup of flour and a tsp of baking powder. Pour evenly into tart pan. Thinly slice a green apple or two, and mix slices with 2 tbsp of apricot preserves. Lay the slices in some sort of pattern. I started from the outside in, and it kinda looked like a🌹👏🏻. Sprinkle the top with a nice dusting of cinnamon and sugar. Bake for one hour. Can be served with vanilla ice cream.

Listen to Breathe (In the Air) by Pink Floyd

Grilled Pesto Chicken Over Spinach Salad and Cous Cous

This is a complete meal that can easily be made vegan by eliminating the chicken. The spinach and cous cous are lovely on their own, as a main or a side. Lots of bright colors here make this particularly visually appealing. This is a snap to make👌🏻.

When I marinate in pesto, I use store bought. I like the Sabra brand. Spread the pesto generously over four white meat chicken cutlets, drizzling with a tbsp of olive oil if your pesto is a drier brand. The chicken should be about half an inch thick, but this isn't a rule. It's just easier to grill if it's not one of those four inch thick deals.

Cover and set aside for 20 minutes.

Vinaigrette for the cous cous and spinach:

A half cup each olive oil and fresh lemon juice

 A tbsp of Dijon mustard

Half a tsp kosher salt

A quarter tsp pepper, optional half tsp cumin for fun (dream big!).

Four cups baby spinach.

Most of the dressing goes on the cous cous, just a couple tbsp goes on the spinach to lightly dress it. It's just a nice support to the starch and protein.

Cous cous salad:

One and a half cups water

Cup and a quarter instant cous cous

Four diced scallions

Pint halved cherry tomatoes, adding more if you want it chunkier.

A lemon to zest

Freshly toasted pine nuts.

Prepare cous cous according to package directions. Break up any clumps after cooking. Cool slightly. Mix with the scallions, tomatoes, and most of the dressing. Toss in a handful of pine nuts and a tsp of zest. Gently combine. Toss spinach with remainder of vinaigrette and platter. Grill the prepared chicken, until there are nice dark grill lines on both sides. Cover tightly with foil to retain juiciness. When it's not too hot to handle, slice thinly. Alternate low piles of the cous cous with stacks of sliced chicken on your platter. Top with extra pine nuts. ✌🏼️
 

💃🏼💃🏼💃🏼

This emoji is what I feel like when I wear this slinky, sexy black outfit. I love the long skirt with the high slits, as well as the off the shoulder, super feminine cropped top. I've always said that Norma Kamali makes me feel just the right mix of strong and feminine. In yoga lately we've been learning a lot about the duality of finding both the strength and ease in any pose/situation. This lesson is invaluable: stand firm and rooted, but be soft and pliable. Maintain your foundation always, but let your heart be open and sweet. This two piece ensemble embodies these qualities. I love wearing long skirts for a fun night out. It's a less obvious choice than "jeans and a top"🙄. Everything in the Norma collection is always mix and match. Both these pieces have multiple uses. With the weather finally getting hotter, I'm psyched to wear this look out. ❤️,the 🐝

Listen to Whatta Man by Salt-N-Pepa

#DREAMZ 💿💿

You know when you have those intensely magical moments, in which you are so acutely aware that everything that's ever happened to you has led to a certain point? And you are so overcome with divine trust in both the universe and yourself, that the only thing left to do is to weep with gratitude? I had such a moment recently, and it will easily go down as one of the epic events over the course of my entire life span. No matter what age I will ultimately live to be, this event will be a major highlight. And I'm talking about a life that will contain many epic moments, since I'll do everything in my power to make that so.

Over the past year and a half, since the Jessie ship was steered in a new direction, I am continuously blown away by what "the universe" has offered me. I put that in quotes since that term is so grossly overused and diluted, but there is no question an unseen force that is constantly at work to meet us vibrationally.  In my quest for self study and understanding, I am learning to clearly see all the invitations the universe has hand written for me. These invitations manifest in the form of other humans, opportunities, physical changes, exact moments, and emotions I never paid attention to because they were scary and unpleasant. The universe can offer away, but only does so when we are ready to accept these invitations. What usually causes us to decline is fear. Fear of failure, fear of change, fear of growth, fear of mistakes, fear of embarrassing ourselves, and fear of what others will think/say. Fear is evil. It fucks us up tremendously. The good news, however, is that it's not at all permanent. It is a force to drive out, but it is indeed possible, and frankly necessary in order to live your fullest life. Fear is what took me so long to enroll in DJ school two years ago. It is what made me shlep a friend to my first semester of classes, which is soooo unlike me; I often write about how I'm very comfortable going places solo. Listen, fear is a human emotion. I no longer chastise myself for having it. Any thought or feeling on the human spectrum of emotion is an experience we are meant to have. It's how we then go on to handle it that determines the course of our lives.

Since I've opened up my life, all kinds of wonderful (and some not) people have popped up in it. I allowed for this by clearing space. It's logic; out with the old, in with the new. I met James through Federica. If you're a longtime reader, firstly, I love you so much. Secondly, you may recall an article I wrote about my contractor, Al, back in August. Al is Federica's father. Their entire family has been a gift in my life. It's almost impossible to quantify the relationship I have with them. So I meet James through Fed. We hang out, we play, we enjoy life together. Like attracts like. James is super fabulous and works in the NYC hotel industry. He's the kindest, most generous guy. That he has killer fashion sense and the coolest collection of eyeglasses is an added bonus. Oh, and we love the same music, which we discovered while clubbing in Brooklyn. Several weeks ago, I'm sitting in a doctor's waiting room and I get a life changing email. Those are beyond cool, btw. They can make history. The Surrey hotel in NYC is launching the opening of their rooftop bar. They're looking for a fabulous DJ who can mix an old school Sinatra vibe with current/upbeat. James was like, you can definitely do this. This was a clear message from a higher force; Girl, you ready for this.

I am in no position to argue with nature, and nature is growth. Nature is change. Nature propels herself forward every damn day, revealing literal wonder and magic. Human beings are a function of nature, probably the most complicated species around, which is why we get all screwed up when we resist it. I read something on IG that I loved; how nature loves and supports courage. How once we hurl ourselves into the abyss, we find its really a soft featherbed. I have proof of this idea; I have lived it with all the twists and turns my life has taken. I started to view my head as a file cabinet. Sure, there was a cabinet of fear. But I also have a huge drawer of courage and strength. Not theoretically but actually. I now know that about myself. I have proof. So I imagined closing the fear drawer and opening the courage drawer. I so admire and envy people who simply do not feel scared, but right now that's not me. It might never be, and that's ok, as long as I manage my fears and don't allow them to govern my life. I so, so believe that the universe is caring for me and guiding me. I learned this through daily yoga and mediation practice. I can tell you life is a helluva lot more enjoyable when we believe. It just is. If I don't trust, then I'm choosing to invite doubt into my life, and we all know how that story ends. So I trusted the universe, who had sent me James, and I trusted James that I was intended for this moment in time. I trusted my DJ journey, which was ridiculed by some very small minded, unsupportive people that I knew.  I trusted my teacher at Scratch, who would never push me off a cliff if he didn't believe I could fly. He knows who he is, and he knows what the past couple of years have meant to me. How metaphorical they've been. Every time I allowed fear and doubt to cloud my vision, it was knowing that he was sure I could handle it that slammed the fear drawer shut. When the student is ready the teacher appears. Only this certain sensei at this certain dojo would have gotten me here. I'm crystal clear on that. When you know, you know...

So back to this incredible night. Picture it: a beautiful, chic rooftop bar on the famed NYC Upper East Side at the landmark Surrey hotel, the first hot evening of the season, beautifully dressed attractive people, sexy artwork on display by London artist Jimmie Martin, high end liquor flowing, delicious food being passed around, AND MUSIC. I mean, the place was bumping! Usually this rooftop bar features a live jazz band. They wanted a different feel to this event, and I was so proud to deliver that. No one expected that the chick in the silver Soul Train jumpsuit, could kick it with a Rat Pack vibe. I wanted to honor the hotel's history with Sinatra, Tony Bennett/Lady Gaga, Dean Martin, and Bobby Darin. It was a great way to kickoff the night. New York glittered with glamour and gravity. I then bumped it up with Motown, one of my favorite genres, and then some disco. After that it was clear I had the guests loose enough, and I hit them with 80's, 90's, and rap. My eclectic nature really had room to shine that night.

I know being a DJ is not about me; it's about the partygoers, but it feels so good to feed the people what they want. They often don't even know what they want to hear; that's my job. I love providing for people, and holding space with my energy. Watching the crowd was my favorite part. Anticipating what they'd like to hear, interacting, engaging, giving and receiving all our energies as one unit. It was beautiful. I have never felt more radiant or alive. This is musical connection, and I've been addicted to it my whole life. This is how I will transmit yogic philosophy; I will use music and words to fuse us together. We are all given different means of serving humanity. When people are with me for the night, whether they arrived to the party happy or sad, I will take care of them. I am energetically strong, I can handle everyone's moods. If they can just be in the moment and enjoy, then I've done my job. As I looked out onto the crowd, I felt so moved that one little Jessie made 300 people have a sick time. All of us just wants to be happy. All of us. We can't achieve that alone. We need each other more than is comfortable to admit. It can feel weak to admit we need others, but it isn't at all. A garden needs all kinds of flowers to be its most beautiful, a dish needs a variety of spices. Let's all just be here together. I had the time of my life that night. I have been beaming ever since. That night was a gift, but it was proof of all my dreams and determination. I wanted this for myself and I set out to get it. As I said, nature loves and rewards courage.

The magnitude of all this hit me as I lit my Shabbat candles after the gig. For years I prayed fervently to God to show me creative and spiritual fulfillment.  I had no idea how to get it, but I knew I was lost without it. This week, after blessing my family and the Sabbath, the words "thank you" just kept tumbling out. Over and over and over. It is true that gratitude is the key to happiness. I am grateful for my passion for music, grateful for my desire to share it, and grateful to every person who has taught me how to be a messenger of lyrics and melody. Everything in life begins with a dream, and the only one who can decide what that dream is is YOU. Do you realize how powerful that makes you?? Your dream lives within you. Fight your ass off to uncover it. Do whatever it takes for however long it takes. Try different avenues of excavation. Once you do, you will be catapulted into a richer existence. This is just how this works. You are worth it. You deserve it. You are ready. See you on the dance floor. I got you, I promise.

Love, DJ LADY BLAGA

Listen to What's Luv? (feat. Ja Rule & Ashanti) by Fat Joe

Kotel Compass

It's widely known that the Kotel, the Western Wall, in Israel is a place of deep religious and spiritual significance. People from all over the world, of all religions or non religions, flock to the Kotel to communicate with God. I have a lot of friends who feel they can only access their spirituality at this wall. This is a problem, particularly if one doesn't live anywhere near Jerusalem. All humans have spirits all the time. If those spirits are dormant or neglected unless we tell ourselves we are "at one specific place", then we aren't properly functioning the majority of the time. If we attach feeling connected and alive to an object, a place, a holiday , a date on a calendar, or even another person, then we are setting ourselves up for spiritual failure. Any of these outside sources can and will go away at some point, leaving us bereft and sad. The holiday will end, we will leave Israel, the person might move or die, and the object could be lost or destroyed at any time. Blaming or crediting an inanimate object with the whole of your spirituality is an unnecessary mistake.  We have these things inside us already, and only we can attach to them. There is no question this is internal work and not external. It's definitely a form of avoidance in seeking "things" to fill us with godliness, even if said things are holy. It doesn't matter; to put all our eggs in another basket, when we are the chickens, is a bizarre handing off of the greatest part of being alive. This really begs the question; to what degree to we place importance on objects in general? Even highly observant Jews are divided on the intrinsic spiritual powers of the Kotel. Some believe the stones themselves hold magical properties, and are a direct line to Hashem, while others see it as just a wall. Symbolic, yes, but it's a "pile of stones", as one friend put it. It's important to note that this person did indeed make Aliyah/move to Israel, and is completely orthodox. He intended no disrespect. He, like myself, thinks it is just a historic wall. I don't feel as drawn to the Kotel as I used to. I don't feel compelled to run there when I visit Israel. I am bursting with spirituality everywhere in Israel, even on a beach in tel Aviv. Especially on a beach in Tel Aviv! Watching the sunset, surrounded by people outdoors who are full of life, enjoying their families, this truly activates my soul. I feel grateful for life, grateful for the state of Israel, grateful for the warmth of the sun, and for the energy all around me. The point is that we are denying ourselves if we don't learn to live in a spiritual state in any situation. This discussion arose around the Friday night table. A different close friend described the intense connection he feels to Hashem only at the Kotel. I said, but you're only there maximum once a year so where does that leave you the other 364 days? Wouldn't it be so wonderful for you, I continued, if you could feel that way here in New Jersey? How much richer would life be then? Our lives would be happier, fuller, and more peaceful if we made it a mission to do whatever it takes to infuse the mundane with meaning. If we don't, the only ones that suffer is us. With all the practical responsibilities of life, it is so daunting to have to worry about the intangible. Where do we begin? We think we have control over the physical, the tangible, so this is what we seek for comfort. It never works though. If anything, there might be fleeting instant gratification, and that always fades. We are tired, burnt out, and don't want to have to feel responsible for one more thing. We can prove we own a car, bought the house, built the pool, put on the yalkmuka, but we can't prove we are spiritual. So this responsibility, the obligation we have to serving our souls, gets shelved. No one knows if we lack in that area. But we know, and that causes a nagging feeling of unrest. That's the spirit crying out for nourishment. Constant nourishment. A soul can indeed starve to death. We cannot rely on any kind of structure to fix that, it's an unrealistic expectation. If you are amongst those who do feel a jolt of spirituality from the Kotel, I ask you, for nobody's sake but your own, to ask yourself how you can perpetuate that beautiful feeling. If you really ask, you'll start to find answers. This is one of the most important questions you can ever ask. Questions are often a gift. They lead to self study, and the more layers we unpeel, THAT is the key to a spiritual life. Wherever you are.

Jump(suit) for Joy

One of the numerous things bravo King, Andy Cohen, and I have in common is that we love a fly jumpsuit. Also side ponytails, Ramona, and boy bands, to name just a few. I've met Andy a couple times, once at a Knicks game and then when I uncomfortably accosted him in the hallway outside a taping of Watch What Happens Live. I was wearing my fleece Mazal bathrobe. My friend LMT and I also brought him a vintage snoopy lunchbox, a custom Bravo Scrabble board we'd spent weeks making, and cupcakes with his face. Stalker much🕵🏻?? I also once called into the show singing a song, as I asked Gigi a stupid question about that season of Shahs of Sunset. 
   

As for this jumpsuit, it's Maje. I loved it's vintage, 70's feel. I've said this before, but it made me feel like Bianca Jagger seamlessly getting out of a limo, "ignoring" the paparazzi. The white shoes and necklace gave a great, fresh pop to an otherwise deeper color palette. As the weather was turning colder, the white was a less obvious choice. Hence why I dug it. The ultimate accessory was this navy Maison Michel hat from the ever fab boutique Five Story. This hat is a special piece. I'm not going to spew some bullshit about how "I just threw it on". When I do talk like that it's honest, but this wasn't one of those times. There are very few components to this outfit, each cleanly selected to support the jumpsuit statement. The jumpsuit is the only piece with pattern so it shines. The only downside to wearing this is that it makes going to the bathroom a giant pain in the ass🚽. Butt, chalk it up to the things we do for glamour. Am I right, Ladies?  Jumping for joy if I made you laugh😅. I love all your pieces, not just one. 😍,LB

PS: in case you're wondering, the white ankle booties are Maison Martin Margiela. Add to my list of items I'd like to be buried in.

Protein Peanut Butter Energy Bars

I have been wanting to tinker around with this type of treat for awhile, and I'm psyched to have gotten the ball rolling with these. Oats, peanut butter, vanilla protein powder, chocolate, and dried cranberries 🙋🏼🙋🏼🙋🏼. There is flour and brown sugar, and I'll figure out a way to sub those out. Feel free to do so on your own. Please let me know if you've nailed it, I'd love to hear your input.

I used vegan butter here, so these treats are indeed vegan. I really enjoyed making these easy bars. It was like a giant slab of granola baking. Cut only when cooled completely. If you're freezing then wrap them individually and take out as needed. Def a way healthier desert or snack for the kiddies.

Ingredients:

1 and half sticks vegan butter

1 and half cups old fashioned rolled oats

1 cup flour

1 cup firmly packed dark brown sugar

2 tbsp vanilla protein powder

 1/4 cup natural peanut butter

1/3 cup craisins or raisins

Half cup dark chocolate chips. Or use a packed cup to a cup and a third of your fave mix ins.

1/4 each tsp cinnamon and salt

 1 and a half tsp vanilla

 

 

Directions:

Oven 350. Line a nine inch square baking pan with foil and grease well. Mix all dry ingredients except the mix ins. Set aside. Melt the butter sticks totally, let cool. Then add to the dry ingredients, along with the vanilla.

Add mix ins and combine well. Dough will be moist and crumbly. Pour dough into pan and flatten with fingers. Bake until top is golden brown, 35 to 40 minutes.

Cool completely on a wire rack. Lift the foil onto a work surface when ready. Peel off foil and cut into bars. Grab and go! Makes 18 bars.

❄️🐰

These snow bunny pics were really fun to shoot. These were an impromptu addition to a recent shoot I did. After a dozen costume changes, it was so nice to slip on boots and leggings and jump around in fresh snow. A yummy coat, slick boots, and sporty shades are all one needs to pretend to be chillin in Aspen. Sporty leggings and a turtleneck sweatshirt were the easiest building blocks. That they were both black kept everything clean looking, so it was effortless to just switch coats, sunglasses, and boots. I've had both these classic Moon Boots and Pajara faux fur boots for several years. They each look brand new, and have withstood winter wear and tear so well. Fitted leggings or skinny jeans are what make a bulky, heavy coat still feminine looking. Some days I don't care if I resemble the Michelin Man, but other days I try to avoid that. Snow in suburbia looks like a winter wonderland. While my city friends kvetch about gray sludge, I feel like I'm in Narnia. I get such a kick out of foreigners who have never seen snow, and CANNOT BELIEVE IT. I mean that's just so cute. They're right though, fresh snow is so pretty. The Lady Blaga team always makes fun our priority, otherwise there's no point to this. So we hopped in the snow like happy  bunnies 🐰❄️!

Listen to Unpretty by TLC

Void Transaction

So I've had this title sitting in my draft pile for months. This is unlike me; usually when an idea strikes I have an urgency to get it out immediately. I love that part of the creative process, that it's a deep need. I think I've held off writing this post so as not to sound judgmental or hypocritical. This piece is not meant to condemn those who shop a lot. That's not my business. Rather, after examining my own patterns and shifts in said patterns, I have learned a lot about the incessant need to buy shit. It is not revelatory that shopping fills a void. That is known, yet it is a crack addiction that is deemed acceptable since it isn't actually crack. Especially if it's "stuff for the kids".  Do our children really care if they have six sweatshirts or eight? Of course not. There is good reason why when on a show about hoarding, there is always a psychiatrist or psychologist on hand. Obtaining THINGS is unquestionably something we do as a means of keeping busy, distraction, giving a time table to an otherwise empty and unstructured day, and a shot of instant (though unfulfilling) gratification. THINGS and STUFF can also dangerously be expressions of false love. I recently spoke to a middle aged man who said he needs to shop incessantly, since the giving to him of stuff was the only way his mother was "kind" to him as a boy. People often give tangible items when they can't give what others really need to receive; the intangible. That is the root of our own adult shopping habits with ourselves. We buy all sorts of unneeded crap for the same reason; to give ourselves the tangible SINCE WE CAN'T GIVE OURSELVES THE INTANGIBLE. I put that in caps so you'll pay careful attention. Instead of filling our days with searching for self love, acceptance, growth, and the scariest of all; what we need to CHANGE, we run to a store. Adults fill their carts and baskets with empty objects instead of taking time to observe those patterns. It is hands down a means of deflection and distraction from filling out spiritual baskets and emotional carts.

I once read a brilliant line in an article. I think it was one of the Ephron sisters. She wrote of her unhealthy marriage like this, "we filled the gaps in our marriage with things". That line  struck me in its truth and honesty. Cars, clothes, redecorating, purses, artwork.  "We bought this together" or "he bought this for me".  Sure, acquiring mementos together on a trip or a sentimental gift is lovely. We all love genuine tokens of love and affection. But I suspect the root of much of that giving doesn't come from a pure well of the desire to just give. To give in the unconditional sense. Because real, pure giving doesn't rely on materialism.  It just doesn't.  Someone who is certain how deeply loved they are, be it by themselves or another, doesn't need a bracelet to prove that.  I once spoke to a woman who went to five different supermarkets a week. She bought different items in each store. She wasn't in the best of health, so I asked her why doesn't she go to one store and make her life easier? She knew why. She said, "without this I would have nothing to do." That made me so sad. How we start off on this planet, full of potential and possibility, and can so easily wind up directionless, having no idea what the hell to do with our precious time. Days wasted shopping, running, returning, pretending to be busy until it's carpool time, dinner time, or our show comes on. By the way, the supermarket woman died a few years later. Think about that.

I was never an incessant shopper, but the few times I did go I'd buy a lot. Too much. Purchasing these items made me "happy". Look what I did today; I got these gorgeous shoes to wear to the next upcoming bar mitzvah. Buying all sorts of crap for the house, the kids. It doesn't have to be Gucci; Bed Bath and Beyond can be just as much of an addiction. Basically, we are addicted to distracting ourselves from a myriad of serious, heavy shit that is begging for our attention and awareness. I knew I was done with this phase in my life when I went to Italy last summer. The Italian airport is famous for its huge collection of duty free designer shops. I didn't glance at them; I had no interest. None. I bought a beautiful apron with lemons and Italian words, as a memento from my trip. I love aprons, I always wear them. I bought the same one for S, who also loves them. The lemon apron has become one of our special things. It makes us smile. That's all I wanted from my trip. As I continue to unload the need for the physical, I am indeed lighter and cleaner. I'm not being penalized for overweight in the metaphorical sense. Lighten your load. The more you eliminate from your life, the more shelves you clear out for what matters. I promise it works. If you're addicted to stuff, don't judge yourself. Go over your need for these patterns, like you would a credit card statement. Study yourself, learn about yourself, and go return what you don't need. I mean emotionally. Give back fear, emptiness, sadness, boredom, and anxiety. And go acquire what you really need and want. You don't need me to tell you what that is; you already know. And I know you know these answers aren't found in a pair of shoes.   

Always Yours, Lady Blaga

Que Sera Quesadilla with Express Lane Guac 🌮🌯

Fine, those are taco and burrito emojis but it's close enough. You have to use the cards you're dealt with🃏.  I looooove making quesadillas for my kids! It's essentially a Mexican version of grilled cheese, so it feels cooler. This is a lovely meal that works for a super fast brunch, lunch, or dinner. Heck, even breakfast if you wake up hungry and are in the mood for some international love. This meal is legit five minutes total. I really enjoy using my griddle, as I've said many times. I must have been a short order cook in a diner in a past life. If you're making these for a few peeps they can assemble their own from different toppings and cheeses, like make your own pizza. You just have to grill and flip. Or you can just make a couple variations without asking your guests (better), and they can all share.

The quesadillas are cut into wedges with a pizza cutter, another fun kitchen tool. A sharp, serrated knife works well too. The wedges serve beautifully and look really professional layered gently on a rustic or white platter. If you're having a casual brunch, two or three quesadilla variations with a soup and a green salad is all you need to both impress and enjoy (you're important too❤️). Hosting should not equate indentured servitude.

Ingredients:

Flour or whole wheat tortillas

Shredded cheddar and mozzarella cheese

Can of black/red beans rinsed and drained

Tbsp olive oil, and a pastry brush to brush the oil

Chopped tomatoes,

Sliced, black olives,

Thinly sliced peppers any color

Diced and seeded jalapeño.

These are just topping suggestions, but use whichever you like. For these here I used mozzarella, red peppers, and black beans.

Brush the griddle or large frying pan with a tbsp of oil. Heat well over medium high heat. Place one tortilla down and top with a handful of cheese, spreading out but leaving a two inch border with none. This prevents the cheese oozing out and running away from your meal. 

When the cheese is semi melted add other toppings. Put some more cheese on top, followed my the second tortilla. Brush more oil on top. Let cook until contents are fairly melted together and bottom tortilla is golden brown. Flip and cool another minute or two until both sides are crispy with the insides all melded together. Slide off griddle onto a cutting board. Let cheese set a couple minutes before slicing into wedges.

Now for the fastest guac ever. I've started making this for my girls nightly, and God forbid they like chopped vegetables, so I made this easy, no frills version for them. Double this for more than two people.

One ripe avocado

Half a lime

Half a teaspoon each kosher salt and cumin

Quarter tsp pepper

Slice avocado in half and scoop flesh (so Silence of the Lambs!) into a bowl. Mash. Very thoroughly squeeze the half a lime, getting the max amount of juice. Add seasonings. Mix well. Adjust seasonings to taste. Can add chopped cilantro, flat leaf parsley, tomatoes, and red onion. Squeeze in a siesta at some point and tell Dora the Explorer to go F herself🖕🏼.

Te' Amo, Senorita Blaga

Cut It Out

It's so nice when an outfit or item works for more than one season. Leather all year made a big comeback a couple years ago. While I wouldn't wear this in the summer, I'd certainly put it on in the Fall, Winter, and Spring. It's a great transitional look since despite the head to toe leather, it's sleeveless and has cut out work all over the bottom half. This two piece ensemble can certainly be broken up. I'd love to find a pair of high waisted white pants for the top. The skirt would look pretty with a cream camisole under a cropped denim jacket, or even a whimsical tee shirt. I've grown to really love navy. It's slimming, classy, and sophisticated. This outfit exposes my arms, but the cut overall remains demure. This is a nice change from dressing in sexy body con looks. I'm comfortable in both masculine and feminine styles of dress, and my choices are mood dependent. I reach for this outfit when I'm feeling a lil girlier. It's perfect for dressy events. I've worn it with navy heels before, but these iridescent pumps add a bit of pizazz. The cut out detailing lightens up the heaviness of the leather, thereby making it suitable for warmer weather too.

I bought this at a store called Miri, which specializes in more modest designs for religious women. I love highlighting designers that cater to the sensitivity and needs of all kinds of groups. Just as when I wrote about Muslim designer Vivi Zubedi during NYFW, I'm so pleased to write about a Jewish designer who dresses her community for their level of comfort. Very observant Jewish women wouldn't wear sleeveless, and I appreciate that Miri has all kinds of styles. Just as more religious women should be accommodated, so should gals like me, who don't find the exposure of my arms to be problematic. There is enough fashion, creativity, and beauty to make all of us feel good. We are all entitled to as many lovely options as possible 💙💙💙.

Personally, I've never been hung up on externals. I define spirituality as coming purely from the inside. I think it's a mistake to focus so much on clothing determining our connection to God. It can distract from working on things internally. Again, just my opinion. I am sure I've written about this, but in high school I wasn't allowed to take a final because I didn't wear socks on a 95 degree day, thereby exposing my ankles under my floor length skirt. THAT IS INSANE. I digress...in my dress...  Have whatever kind of day you want. It's your choice. Anyone who told you otherwise is lying. You are more than ankle bones. Love, LB