A while ago I had the concept for how I wanted to look for my son’s big Torah reading performance on the Shabbat day of his bar mitzvah. I am so not a fan of the whole faputzed bar mitzvah mother shtick (this post needs a glossary). The same blowout, the same nose job, the same Roland Mouret fitted dress yada yada yada. Your girl is not a conformist! But putting all that aside, I wanted to feel as natural and stripped down as possible. Feminine, soft, summery, and chilled out.
My son was born on the eve of the holiday of Shavuot, a time that commemorates the important wheat harvest in Israel. The story of the holiday mostly takes place in a wheat field. Not that any 13 year old boy would be caught dead frolicking through a wheat field with his mother, but that’s the look I was aiming for. Soft hippie boho chic. Enter my new favorite designer ever, Love Shack Fancy. I heard about their shop in downtown New York and hightailed it down there. It was love at first sight with me and this dress (and about seven others). Modest for synagogue, cream with tons of tiny buttons and detailing, this dress could not have been more perfect for a daytime summer event. I felt like the hostess with the mostess, mixed in with a dash of Mrs Havisham from Great Expectations. My hair look was a middle part with long, loose beachy waves with tiny little braids woven in. Hippie princess hair.
As the planning for the big day unfolded, the aesthetic and mood we wanted was also natural, gauzy, light, and fresh. Tons of fresh herbs and greenery, muslin, burlap, natural woods, and creamy linens. It was as if there was a bar mitzvah scene in The English Patient (worst movie). I really do not like high heels, but my friends told me if I showed up in my dying gold Birkenstock’s they’d clock me over the head with them. Understood. I found the most perfect kitten heeled rose colored satin slip ons. Diane B on the upper east side literally made me feel like Cinderella. I saw these shoes, put them on, and they were perfection. And go me for not teetering on 7 inch stilettos at my own event. I’m not sure why stilts seem to be a requirement for these affairs. I much prefer to stand out in an understated way. When you are radiating joy everyone will see you and feel you (a life lesson). I will wear this dress over and over, each time recalling how wonderful and beautiful this milestone was for my family.