Famous Last Words

This is the song I want played at my funeral. It’s called “That’s How Strong My Love Is” by the great Otis Redding. It’s the message I want to leave my kids and loved ones when the time in this body is up. I recently played this for a friend who was due to speak at his best friend’s memorial service the following day, and he added this to the program upon hearing it. It’s such an important and profound question we must ask ourselves: what do we want to leave behind in the world? I find that the more clarity I have on how I want to live, the more I have on how I want to leave. As my teacher, Sensei Dr. Kōshin Paley Ellison of the New York Zen Center for Contemplative Care asked us recently: how are we actually living our lives in a way that supports the lives we say we want to create? What seeds are we planting, what steps are we taking, what choices are we making? This life is ours to design and live out. We can make the most of it or waste it. And talking about the dreams for our life are meaningless without aligned, consistent, integrated action. That’s just the fact of the matter. In many ways I have taken aligned action and in many ways I have not yet done so. No one can meet my visions, dreams, and ideas for a well lived life but me. 

I want to live a life of strong, full, brave and powerful love, and I wish for my funeral to reflect this. I want my loved ones to know that what I planted and nurtured while I was physically alive will remain energetically alive. I want my kids to feel me in every moment, and the strength of their mother and her love. I want the words of this beautiful song to be a gift and a message, just like my life itself. I share this song with you, it’s such an intimate and moving part of my heart and process. 

What song would you choose for your last words? What would you want your parting message to be? Are you living a life that will lead to the continuation of that message when you’re not in your body?